Showing posts with label New York. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New York. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Mission Ladies


MISSION LADIES

As a young adult I battled depression. I turned to alcohol, etc., and decided that sadness was part of my reality. In one of my journal entries I describe it as "the gall of bitterness." I realize this sounds a little dramatic, but at the time I was extremely insecure, and unsure about how I wanted to conduct myself .... what I wanted as a moral compass. I wanted to be unique and NOT be like everyone I knew, my family, my friends, even my acquaintances, and fashion my moral compass after the religion I grew up with just because it was comfortable or because that is what my loved ones thought I should do. This created a personal anomie, and I determined to find my own path. To make a long story short I had some experiences that scared me to my core, and then experiences that moved through my bones like the marrow that gives them life. I NEEDED to find my spiritual path, and so after turning 21, at a time when most new adults get excited to be free of age limits and restrictions; I turned to limits and restrictions by choosing the religion I grew up with to start my spiritual path. Though I have not continued on that particular path and my spirituality ebbs and flows, I grateful for my journey. I decided to be a missionary; learn by teaching. Lucky for me I lived with and learned from phenomenal women who not only guided me on a beautiful spiritual path, but also pushed me to be a better, more secure, confident, independent woman.

I have not kept in contact with many of these gems, so if you have contact information or know them please forward this blog link to them because I would love for them to know that they have left fingerprints all over this soul of mine.


Kristy Smith: She told me once, "be yourself, don't make Sister Foster someone different than Rochelle; people will like you because you are you." She taught me that each of us have different facets and that being fun does not negate being spiritual.


Tracy Edmunds: She came out one month before me and she didn't like having to share her trainer, Sister Smith, so I was not able to get close to her until later in our missions. But...she taught me about humility and giving. She approached me at a conference after we lived together and apologized for being jealous and mean. That was one the first times I received  a genuine, unsolicited, non-family member apology. Sorries are hard! No one wants to have to say them, but in relationships sincere sorries are like the glue that mends our souls. This was an invaluable lesson.

Erica Love Stephen: How apropo that her middle name is Love because that is what she taught me. She made, not only me, but EVERYONE feel loved. She always had a smile on her face. I was so inspired by her passion and love that I wrote poem. Warning: It is cheesy! No accolades were given, but it describes how I  saw her in the most obvious way.  It's called:

SMILE

What a smile she gives;
She knows Christ lives.
Her heart of pure gold
Allows her to be bold.

"The Gospel is true!" 
She testifies to you. 
Then the Devil fight against her, 
So she shares from the scriptures.

When you shut the door 
She'll fall to the floor; 
Down on her knees;
Begging God please...

Then you will start to question 
All of her conviction.
In the back of your mind
You will find:
Is what she's saying to me 
All that I should be?

So watch out for that smile,
It's a dangerous thing.
She might catch hold of your heart,
...and OH NO!
You might believe.

I wanted those around me to feel that much love for themselves, others, and God, so I  went on a journey to feel that much love. 









Amy Gingery: She taught me that women show they care differently. She teased and chided and poked and prodded. At first, I thought she didn't like me I always believed "there is truth in jest," but with Amy I could not tell. Luckily, we lived together, so we had variable experiences and I learned she DID care. She showed it differently than I had experienced up to that point from a woman, she treated me more like my brothers, but this did not mean she was any less tender or caring. Once I was able to take her out of the box I put her in, because of societal ideals, you would've thought we'd known each other all our lives.

Kristen Hickerson: She taught me I could be more than I thought I could, and the value of hard work.

Haley Young: She loved helping people and gave compliments freely. I always felt good about my self. I learned the power of a compliment. The simplest thing can make someones day. She taught me that the trick to complimenting is honesty. I used to think that compliments sounded contrived and insincere, but when you are honest and sincere compliments encourage and fill the soul.


Michelle Dowling: She always had good council for me and watched out for me. There was no room for judging with her. She had so much faith in me and in Christ; she helped me pull through a difficult time.
She knew how to help me help myself. I went through an especially difficult time when I lived with her. I felt overwhelmed and wanted to have the experiences that I went through written in my journal, but that was just one more thing. So... one morning during our studies she asked if she could write in my journal. She wrote each of the experiences I went through. That was when I learned that instead of asking what I can do to help is not as effective as just doing something, anything.


Jolynn Chidester: She was kind, and set an example of patience and love. I learned how nice it is to be around someone that is easy to be around. She was definitely my glass is half full kind of gal; not in an annoying way, but in a "It's going to be o.k." kind of way. She also was the type of woman that makes you look awesome; no jealousy.

Alisa Terry: She and I had some real rough times, my character was built. I went though a refiners fire. I learned that sometimes you learn valuable lessons in difficult situations. 

Carlene Mitchell: I laughed for the entire three weeks I lived with her. She easily found humor in any situation. She would wake up in the morning and sing this hymn called "Scatter Sunshine." Her voice was terrible and she did not care. She was confident in herself because she knew that she loved to sing and whether she sounded good or not would not stop her from being who she wanted to be. She did not need validation because she knew she didn't sound good, but sounding good was not the point; feeling good is the point. She taught me that no one can make you feel bad unless you let them.


Amy Shepherd: It was easy for her to be good, which helped me to understand my little sister. Both Amy and my sister are different from me in that they want to be good. They are those woman that are faithful! Beautiful woman that can handle trials with elegance. She continues to be this woman. Faith is something that is difficult for me and I am in awe of the people in my life that have this gift. She not only had faith in God, but she had that same type of faith in me. Her faith in me was like an umbrella for the doubts that rained on my soul. 



Lastly but certainly not least, Crystal Jessop: There were many times we were enlightened together. The one word that comes to mind when I think about the impact Crystal had on me is epiphany. I had these little light bulbs going off in my noggin on a daily basis. She was my kite; helping me fly so when lightning struck my key I would light up. Everything I had learned during my year and a half in up-state New York was solidified in my final two months, and that is because Crystal allowed me to fly. 











Monday, January 27, 2014

Erin O'Brien

Erin O'Brien, my anchor, she keeps me grounded to the past, present and future because she understands where I am coming from, who I am, and supports where I am going; not because she agrees with everything, but because she is loyal.

I met Erin when we were both LDS missionaries in Upstate New York. I was being transferred to a new area unexpectedly and three "Sisters" (that is what women missionaries are called) came to pick me up at a meeting place including my "companion" (the woman I would be living and proselyting  with) and two other "sisters" from a nearby area. We all, of course, were exchanging our obligatory inquisitions: What is your name?, How long have you been a missionary?, Where are you from?, etc. When I said I was from Rexburg, Idaho, Erin perked up and began to play the "Do you know?" game because she lived in Rexburg for a few years as a middle school-er. I always find it interesting that you can know similar people and live in a small town like Rexburg, but never cross paths with someone... until you do 2000 miles away. I believe this was not just happenstance; I believe we needed others' fingerprints to recognize the likeness in each other; I believe we needed to meet under those particular circumstances because of a spiritual connection we share. We found that we knew some of the same people and immediately I felt endeared to her easy going nature, and I thought she had to be the most naturally beautiful person I had ever seen. I did not have the good fortune to have Erin as my "companion," but we became fast friends and continued to cultivate our friendship after we came from our missions and resided in Rexburg. As I am writing this a quote by C.S. Lewis keeps coming to mind, “In friendship...we think we have chosen our peers. In reality a few years' difference in the dates of our births, a few more miles between certain houses, the choice of one university instead of another...the accident of a topic being raised or not raised at a first meeting--any of these chances might have kept us apart. But, for a Christian, there are, strictly speaking no chances. A secret master of ceremonies has been at work. Christ, who said to the disciples, "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you," can truly say to every group of Christian friends, "Ye have not chosen one another but I have chosen you for one another." The friendship is not a reward for our discriminating and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each of us the beauties of others.” 

Going along with that, there are three women in my life that there is, I swear, a magnetic field and somehow we keep ending up living in the same city; Erin is one of them. To boot... she is one of those friends, that some of you have talked about, that no matter how much time has gone by you can just pick up where you left off. When she moved to Boise after having spent several years out of contact, I felt like "Hey there, old friend." We did not miss a beat. We fell back into our easy stride of solving the worlds problems, philosophizing about religion, and trying to make light of the world around us. Erin is sarcastic, quick witted, and funny. So... even though our conversations are sometimes heavy and deep, Erin has a way of never letting you leave feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders. I always leave her presence feeling like I have had the most delightful time. Not only is she funny, but she is also kind and generous. She would randomly bring me my favorite chocolate from Sees candy to the salon just because she was going to be around. I felt loved and cared for. She has a knack for that! I'm sure that is one reason why she has such awesome children.
  
I think Erin would say that she is attracted to creative souls. I think, though, that creativity and originality come from people simply being truthful and authentic. Erin's ability to make those around her feel completely comfortable and allowing them to be their authentic selves actually facilitates creative souls without even realizing it. She has allowed me to fail without judgment and always gives me hope to try again. If you know Erin I am sure you have experienced her loyalty and her 100% advocacy of whatever creative project you may be working on.

Erin, there are so many ways in which you have left fingerprints on my soul. Thank you for understanding me, facilitating my creativity and allowing me to be my past, present, and future self. There have been times in my life that only you have been able to say or do the right thing to buoy me up and give me hope that I have something to offer this big bad world.